Skip to main content

Baby Blue - King Krule (Day 1 - Song with color on the title)

Meskipun album 6 Feet Beneath The Moon udah di-release dari tahun 2013, di hidup gue Baby Blue malah jadi soundtrack jaman-jaman ngerjain TA, lebih tepatnya setelah geng wisuda April udah pada cabut. 

Bulan-bulan Maret-Juni 2018 adalah masa transisi gue mencari teman buat ngerjain TA bareng karena teman-teman yang biasa coffee shop hopping buat ngerjain TA bareng lulusnya April semua hiks. Di masa-masa itu lah diperkenalkan Patih sama the luxury of berproduktif di Grind Joe (coffee shop di bawah hotel Moxy): sepi, kursi ergonomis, pencahayaan oke banget, kopi enak, adem (kadang terlalu dingin), internet decent, dan yang terpenting playlist-nya bagus! Playlist bagus yang dimaksud adalah lagu-lagu chill lo-fi hiphop yang sangatlah hyped pada masa tersebut; Mac Ayres, FKG, Honne, Tom Misch dkk -surprisingly emang cocok banget buat backsound produktif. Kemudian karena playlist di Grind Joe lama-lama terasa terlalu berulang, gue berinisiatif membuat extended playlist-nya di Spotify. Salah satu lagu tambahan yang gue masukkan ya si Baby Blue ini, ga ada alasan khusus selain sesuai aja gitu vibe-nya.


Di luar itu, masa-masa tersebut adalah penanda beberapa hal personal bagi gue. Bukan cuma kehilangan peer seperjuangan TA juga baru banget putus dari a 4-year-relationship, teman kosan juga udah ga ada sama sekali, dan teman-teman sebimbingan yang tersisa tinggal Fakhri (yang sukanya ne-a di rumah). So after years of having people around me most of the time, I spent most of those days alone. Meskipun ada Patih si penunggu Grind Joe, intensitas doi produktif di luar juga ngga setinggi gue karena targetnya lulus Oktober.


Most of the time it was just me, caffeine, my drafts, and that playlist.


Karena hobi gue emang coffee shop hopping, jadinya ngga ada masalah sama sekali tuh ne-a sendirian di berbagai coffee shop. Sampai akhirnya bulan puasa datang, langsung kocar kacir karena gabisa ngopi siang-siang dan workstation di kosan bisa dibilang non-existent. Untung punya orang tua super baik (baik atau gemes anaknya ga lulus-lulus), dan mau nyewain apartemen dengan workstation decent selama dua minggu. Jadilah workstation bernuansa coffee shop bisa diciptakan lagi minus the coffee hahaha.


Looking back, it was the toughest and loneliest period of my college life. Pressure ngejar deadline sidang sangat tinggi plus nggak punya support system yang mumpuni. Tapi setelah melalui itu semua dan dengerin Baby Blue lagi, surprisingly yang muncul memori-memori yang menyenangkan aja loh! Top of mind tiap denger lagu ini adalah momen malem-malem mau tidur di apartemen abis beres bimbingan sore harinya,  bobo pake AC (biasanya di kosan kan pake kipas angin), very comfortable bedding, dan di-nina-bobo-in sama suara Archy dengan echo tipis-tipis yang terasa sangat dream-like di lagu ini (not to mention the very soothing guitar loop!). Ultimate zen moment. 


Meskipun lagunya sebenernya mesra, tapi karena lagi ga romantically involved sama siapapun waktu itu, Baby Blue malah jadi personal banget kayak comfort song untuk diri gue sendiri. Manis lah pokoknya kalau meningat momen kesendirian yang ternyata nyaman banget itu. Once you’ve gone through such things, ternyata bisa-bisa aja terlalui dan nggak seburuk premis dari keadaan itu sendiri kok. I’m glad that it has turned into a wholesome memory instead of a traumatic one now.


Terima kasih Archy sudah menemani aku sampai akhirnya lulus!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Album Reviews [Combo Pack]

I'm back on the deck, hurrah! I'm so missing myself writing a proper readable post, the less-curhat less-sok-poetic post, even 'tho I'm not sure people are even into my music shits...but it feels good to be back on the deck!(?) These are my reviews of not-so-new-released albums that I listen to (not so) recently, ujian and college stuffs really took that much of my time-_- I wish I can come out with fresh recommendations but this is just all I have, here it goes, enjoy! The Temper Trap -  Acoustic Sessions EP Sepertinya The Temper Trap berhasil menemukan formula untuk menelurkan album yang flawless dan sangat pas: make it an EP (nggak sesimpel single dan nggak sepanjang LP) consists of six acoustic version of their best songs, here's when things couldn't go wrong. Sewaktu jaman intensif Inten, kerjaan gue kalo di rumah emang suka curi-curi waktu buat hal nggak penting yang bahkan di waktu luang aja nggak pernah gue lakuin, kayak randomly buka iTunes dan me...

There Was No Funeral

June 25th 2024 They took the greatest love of my life away from me, but there was no funeral. They bathed and cleaned her corpse, and all I could think about was if they had took her lash extensions out. They buried her, but I stayed in the car. People cried, but no one hugged me, all that I had was my hand being held by my brother as we drove behind the hearse, Neil Young’s Harvest Moon was playing. I was already isolated for 2 weeks and thought that I would be rewarded by her embrace once it was all over. But there was none of it, it was pain and more pain and more pain. Only after 2 years I could finally cried it all out in somebody’s embrace, didn’t even realized how much I needed to let it all out —how badly I needed to be embraced. Because by the first year, the longing had eaten my insides little by little until there was almost nothing left of me. I don’t want to hold on to this pain forever, even if this pain is the only way I can keep my love for her alive. Because I’m done h...
I never concidered about dying this much until today. And no, this is not a suicidal note. Well not exactly... I don't know but the pain of living is just so unbearable. I wanna go back to the non-existance. I give people pain so much I let my parents down too much now. This is the point where I don't even know if my precense would do anyone any good, and I don't even know which is better to the world: the pain from me leaving or the  trouble I made.
You called me just so you can take out your anger out of your chest. And it still hurts, the fact that I couldn’t ease your anger, I could never did. With all the hatred and resentment in your eyes, it finally hits me, really really hard, realizing that nobody could ever comfort you -not even me, not even once. It hurts much more.

This, wasn't It

"Kalo gitu nggak ada lagi yang perlu dibicarain." Bengong. Asli. Kalo kata-kata bisa membunuh, mungin sekarang gue udah tinggal nama. Oke lebay... Mungkin paling banter sekarang gue cuma butuh transfursi darah. Oke tetep lebay. Intinya, kalimat yang terlontar dingin itu sukses bikin gue lemes, kuping panas, jantung minta lompat keluar, dan otak meronta. Gue bukan abis berantem sama cowok gue since I don't have one wakaka, atau berantem sama bokap nyokap. Yang abis gue lakuin adalah wawancara, seperti yang gue bilang di postingan sebelumnya. Hari ini di mulai dengan baik. Sarapan oatmeal pake pisang, wearing my fave shirt, fave watch, fave bracelet, dan Speed of Sound muncul di radio pagi ini. Gue nunggu giliran selama dua jam lebih dengan kalem dan sedikit nervous. Tapi pas klimaks...wawancara selesai gitu aja setelah si pewawancara denger gue tanggal 25-28 liburan.... Gue tau gue cengeng, satu sekolah juga tau. Tapi udah lama gue nggak ngerasain sekecewa ini dan s...